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I’ve always wanted to be rich.

It’s something that I think about daily. It’s how I define the quality of my life.

But do I deserve to be rich? Do I have what it takes? Is it in my DNA?

Ever since I was a kid, I was fascinated with people who were rich, and curious about what differentiated them from others. Were they smarter? Did they have better ideas? More guts? More charm? Just lucky?

But wait — what exactly do I mean by rich?

While amassing a financial fortune is an awesome goal, what I am really after is living a rich life. One that is FULL of all the things a rich life entails — great relationships, interesting experiences, manageable challenges, worthy accomplishments, good health, financial freedom, a warm and comfortable home, and a frame of mind that is peaceful, joyful, spirited, and filled with a sense of curiosity, adventure, fun, and gratitude. …

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Times Have Changed

My husband and I went out for a walk the other day, and it struck me how much things have changed in such a short period of time.

We were walking in our neighborhood, on the sidewalk, and saw another couple heading towards us. We immediately moved off the sidewalk and onto the road to give them space to pass us by. We did not want to crowd them or make them feel uncomfortable in any way. We wanted to ensure that we were meeting the 6ft social distance requirement. They nodded to us in appreciation of our gesture.

It occurred to me that if we had seen these same people walking toward us on the sidewalk and we moved away in the exact same manner one year ago, they might have been offended. In all likelihood, that very same gesture would have been viewed as ‘racist’, disrespectful, or small-minded. …

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As a general rule, I am not very good at accepting compliments. I never have been. I tend to wave them off and disregard them as uninformed comments coming from people who have lovely intentions but ridiculously low standards.

My daughter has been after me for years trying to teach me how to be more gracious in accepting a compliment. “Thank you, I appreciate that” is the response she recommends. I have tried it out a few times — and while it is definitely the more polite approach, inside it feels very inauthentic and uncomfortable.

As a result, I am very scrupulous about the compliments I hand out. I am careful not to dole out throw-away compliments for the purpose of trying to make someone feel good. It’s not who I am — I am very conscious about making sure that the compliments I give are heartfelt, accurate, and useful. When I do give out a compliment, the recipient knows that I really mean it and that it comes with absolute authenticity. …

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My birthday has always been a bit of a strange day for me. I always find myself a little bit out of sorts — not knowing exactly how to feel about getting older. I tend to look back at the past year to evaluate how it went, what I accomplished, and what extraordinary experiences I had. I think about my relationships, my home, and my lifestyle, and appraise whether or not I am where I want to be at this stage of my life. I also look forward and assess what’s ahead of me, searching for something exciting on the horizon. …

Executive Coaching is a tricky beast. Why? Because it’s elusive and confusing.

What is the purpose of Executive Coaching? Is it designed for people who have challenges and need some kind of intervention and remediation in order to succeed in their career? Is it designed for top performers and leaders who are privileged enough to hire a personal advisor to assist with all aspects of their personal and professional growth?

What the heck is Executive Coaching anyway? Who is it for? How does it work? And what exactly is the ROI?

Who is Executive Coaching For?

I would start by lumping ‘Executives’ into 3 categories: C-suite leaders of large corporations, Entrepreneurs who run sizable companies ($5M — $750M in revenues) and the Senior Leaders that support them both. …

I run a coaching company called Frame of Mind Coaching™ — I’ve been doing it for 16 years. I work with the most challenging type of client — the smart ones who are independent, opinionated leaders, driven to achieve massive goals.

I look at how they think and help them align that thinking with their deepest desires. I ask them to share their most personal thoughts and reflections in a web-based journaling platform that I developed. I invite them to go deep and lead them through a personal transformation. I even teach this process to other individuals who want to learn how to coach powerfully. …

I cannot tell you how many conversations I’ve had with people who are desperately seeking work-life balance. This is probably the number one issue that people seek my help for.

When I speak at conferences, people stand up in a large crowd to ask how I can help them increase their work-life balance. When I am a guest on a podcast, hosts not only ask this question when they are interviewing me, they often keep me on the podcast well after the recording has stopped to share their own struggle with work-life balance. When I am the leader in virtual presentations and invite people to post their greatest challenge, they write about this issue in the chat box. …

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Last week I spoke with a gentleman who owns several thriving businesses. Buying and growing businesses is his strength, and building a strong team around him to take the reins of each business comes to him with ease. My guess was that he had done a great deal of personal development work and it was clearly paying off in his professional success.

I asked him about his experience with coaches and leadership programs. He told me about the investment he made in multiple Tony Robbins events, about an incredible coach he worked with for 16 years who recently passed away and about his current involvement in a peer-to-peer entrepreneurship group. He told me about how much time he spends coaching and mentoring his employees and that coaching others is one of the keys to his own personal development. …

Traditional Measures of Intelligence

There are many instruments that measure intelligence — the kinds that give individuals a score and compare their score to that of the average person. The IQ test, for example, provides a bell curve of intelligence mapping that looks something like this:

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Subjective Measures of Intelligence

A person measures their own intelligence, however, by the beliefs they acquire over the span of their lifetime and the evidence they collect during that time to prove their beliefs. Often, people form their beliefs as a result of the messages they have picked up from others.

Let me give you a few…

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Photo by Xuan Nguyen on Unsplash

I’ve been writing newsletter articles for the better part of my life. I wrote this one article, 3 Kickass Recruiting Strategies, over 20 years ago. I remember vividly the scathing email I received as a result of this particular article, reprimanding me for using a swear word (“kickass”). The woman who wrote let me know how disappointed she was in my approach, that she could not believe I would stoop to such a low level and that she would no longer be following my work.

I love the word Kickass, so I am using it again here. More specifically, I am using it as a serious nod to my friend Jeff Wiener who created an entire brand called The Kickass Entrepreneur and wrote a book called The Kickass Entrepreneur’s Guide to Investing. …


Kim Ades

Kim is the President & Founder of Frame of Mind Coaching™ & JournalEngine™ Software, an executive coach & a supermom of 5.

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